Strip 028

5th Jun 2014, 12:00 AM in Forest of Doom
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Average Rating: 5 (1 votes)

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Raxon 5th Jun 2014, 2:51 AM edit delete reply
Ah, failed stealth checks. Is there anything you can't ruin?

Before you ask, yes, it an ruin a seduction check. You probably don't want to know why I was rolling stealth checks to make a seduction, but I'll tell you anyway.

So there I was, hitting it off with this NPC, and I ask the DM, "Is this character a guy, or a girl?"

"You're not sure."

"Fine. I ask her. 'Pardon my ignorance, but are you male or female?'"

"Honey, you'll just have to find out tonight."

Ladies and gentlemen, that is why I was following the blind npc and spying on her. Yes, it did turn out to be a her.

Yes, we did hook up later after I found out that she was into some pretty kinky stuff, and she was just pissed because I had been spying on her all day, and hadn't snatched her up or anything. Next chance I got, I snuck up behind her, grabbed her, and ran off with her over my shoulder.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how a rogue gets kinky with the king's daughter.
guy 6th Jun 2014, 1:16 PM edit delete reply

Story time today is about comically failed skill checks.
Here's mine:
It was some campaign set in the fey world, and I was playing a high wisdom/charisma hammadryad paladin. The party was making a scouting mission on an enemy camp, and do to a botched stealth check, what was supposed to be recon turned into a rumble.
That is not what the story is about, however.
In the enemy camp were, for some reason, huge barrels of honey, and one of the party's dumber members decided to try and make off with one.
One botched strength check later, and my paladin was wearing the contents of that barrel.
But THAT isn't what this story is about either.
See, there were these bears.
Put bluntly, the DM had me roll a charisma check to see if I was an interesting target . . . and that is when the botched roll comes in.
I'm still not sure how I survived that.
Allan Mills 17th Nov 2014, 6:15 PM edit delete reply

I can still recall when I was playing Dark Heresy and in some cases it made sense to try to move stealthily. Problem was, as soon as we told the DM we wanted to move quietly he'd ask for a skill roll. Being as we were a) low level and b) not even remotely skilled or statted for stealth we'd inevitably botch the attempt. Even if one person made their roll, someone else would fail it.

Since we'd failed a stealth roll the DM would feel obligated to make something bad happen in response. So of course we'd make things worse by trying to be sneaky rather than just proceeding as normal.
JET73L 18th May 2015, 7:37 AM edit delete reply

Pantheon. A Coyote and an Susano-O have almost finished off a Greek titan-ish... thing. As the Coyote, I latch onto its head with my jaws, and refuse to let go no matter how much it squirmed. Susano-O got a 10 (the worst possible roll) to cut its head off. The DM ruled that while he didn't cut its head off, he did take off its last couple of hit points... after the sword went right through my neck.

That's only technically a skill roll because of the way Pantheon works, so here's a bonus story: A drunken pirate in my party meets a nubile young woman. Everyone else is convinced that "she" is a 13-year-old boy. The pirate attempts to diplomatically ask if he's male or female and, thanks to a complete botch, asks with his hand instead of his words. The molested young noble promply kicks the pirate in the groin.
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